Society imposes a tacit rule that males should not wear their hearts on their sleeve. In fact, being emotional or expressing emotions is often considered an unwanted feminine characteristic. What’s wrong with expressing emotions anyway? The capacity to feel and express emotions is an integral part of being a human being, regardless of sex. With the way we are being socialized into our respective gender roles, males are taught to be stoic and poker-faced. This does not mean that they do not feel emotions such as sadness. This does not mean that they are immune to depression.
What this may mean is that males are just better in masking their depression. It may be easier for the male to admit fatigue, irritability, loss of interest in work or hobbies, and sleep disturbances rather than feelings of sadness, worthlessness, and excessive guilt.
Also, males may be employing more defenses to preserve the illusion of invulnerability. Sigmund Freud, the proponent of the psychoanalytic school of thought, said that when the ego became unduly anxious and overwhelmed, it may unconsciously adopt defense mechanisms that distort one’s perception of reality. Some examples of such mechanisms are given below. Try to identify yours.
Defense Mechanism Denial
What it is An attempt to ignore unacceptable realities by refusing to acknowledge them
For example Putting off a medical checkup in spite of recurring bodily aches and pains
Defense Mechanism Compensation
What it is Covering up weaknesses by emphasizing a more desirable trait or by overachievement in a more comfortable area
For example Thirst for intellectual pursuitsto balance for less than average looks
Defense Mechanism Displacement
What it is Transferring emotional reactions from one object or person to another object/person
For example Venting your anger towards a punching bag, imagining it’s your boss’s head
Defense Mechanism Intellectualization
What it is When an emotional response that would normally accompany a painful (or uncomfortable) incident is avoided by use of academic or intellectual explanations that remove personal feelings from the incident
For example You were passed over for a promotion—again—and you say “It’s not my time yet.”
Defense Mechanism Projection
What it is Projects shortcomings or feelings on to others
For example Extreme homophobia for a person afraid of own homosexual inclinations
Defense Mechanism Rationalization
What it is Justification of certain behaviors by faulty logic
For example Cheating on the wife, reasoning that she pushed you to have an affair because she does not accommodate your sexual needs
» Guy Wisdom archive
Men's Health Philippines - October 2005 Issue
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Society imposes a tacit rule that males should not wear their hearts on their sleeves. In fact, being emotional or expressing emotions is often considered an unwanted feminine characteristic.
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